Attending a wedding for the first time, a
little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in
white?"
"Because white is the colour of happiness, and today is the happiest
day of her life."
The child thought about this for a moment then said, "So why is the
groom wearing black?"
___
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she
could, trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed,
"Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let
me be late!"
While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell getting
her dress dirty and torn. She got up, brushed herself off, and started
running again!
As she ran she once again began to pray, "Dear Lord, please don't let
me be late... But please don't shove me, either!"
___
An elderly woman died last month. Having
never married, she requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten
instructions for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn't take
me out while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm
dead."
___
A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you
had to arrest your own mother?"
"Call for backup."
___
A Sunday school teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus
with them to Jerusalem. A small child replied, "They couldn't get a
baby-sitter."
___
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the
Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the
commandment to "Honour thy father and thy mother," she asked,
"Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and
sisters?"
Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, "Thou shall not
kill."
___
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including
human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him
how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he was ill,
and she said, "Johnny, what's the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I think I'm going
to have a wife."