• Whenever you find the key to success, someone changes the lock. 
  
  
• To Err is human, but to forgive is not a Company policy. 
  
  
• The road to success is always under construction. 
  
  
• Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk. 
  
  
• In order to get a loan, you first need to prove that you have ability to repay back. 
  
  
• Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak. 
  
  
• If at first you don't succeed?. Destroy all evidence that you ever tried. 
  
  
• You can never determine which side of the bread to butter. If it falls down, it will always land on the buttered side. 
  
  
• Anything dropped on the floor will roll over to the most inaccessible corner. 
  
  
• 42.7% of all statistics is made on the spot. 
  
  
• If you come early, the bus is late. If you come late, the bus is still late. 
  
  
• Once you have bought something, you will find the same item sold somewhere else at a cheaper price. 
  
  
• When in a queue, the other line always moves faster and the person in front of you will always have the most complex of transactions. 
  
  
• If you have paper, you don't have a pen. If you have a pen, you don't have paper. If you have both, no one calls. 
  
  
• The door bell or your mobile will always ring when you are in the bathroom. 
  
  
• After a long wait for a bus, two will arrive at the same time. The bus into which you get will always be more crowded than the other. 
  
  
• If your exam is tomorrow, there will be a power cut tonight. 
  
  
• Irrespective of the direction of the wind, the smoke from the cigarette will always tend to go to the non-smoker 
  
  
• Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need more. 
  
  
• There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side. 
  
  
• An expert is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing. 
  
  
• Many things can be preserved in alcohol. Dignity is not one of them. 
  
  
• Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference. 
  
  
• When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets. 
  
  
• Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. 
  
  
• Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make them when nobody is looking. 
  

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