• Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
  
  
• A jump-lead walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."
  
  
• Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
  
  
• A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says:" A beer please, and one for the road."
  
  
• Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"
  
  
• "Doc, I can't stop singing "The Green, Green Grass of Home."  "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."  "Is it common?"  Well, "It's Not Unusual."
  
  
• An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.
  
  
• I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
  
  
• I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel.
  
  
• What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh.
  
  
• And finally, there was the person who sent several different puns to his friends with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

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